 |
|
 |
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|
|
||||||||||||
     
|
|
Discovering Where I BelongI would think that every person on earth spends some time in their life wondering who they are, what their life is for, and especially...where they belong. For me, it was the last question, about “belonging”, that came at an early age. Some might think that since I was born into a Christian family, that this question may not apply to me. However, this was not true. Being human, I was always considering what was best for me and what direction my life should and would take. Although I had a good childhood growing up in Texas, my life took an unexpected turn in 1988 when I was thirteen years old--my parents divorced. Among the Christians we met with in the local church, divorce was uncommon. My first question was, “What is God doing?” Why would He allow this to happen? Over the next several years, going to high school and college I led a very worldly life...in the sense that I grew apart from the Lord and spent much time pursuing happiness--dating, dancing, music, money, etc. But deep within me I always knew I was different. I could feel it. I could feel that I never really belonged. I didn't belong with those people, in those places, nor did I belong in the condition I had let myself get into. Unhappiness, low self-esteem, and apathy saturated every part of my being--except for one part where a small hope resided. This hope was my faith and love for the Lord Jesus Christ. Over the next couple of years, through the genuine love, care, encouragement, and supply of Christ I received from the Christians in the local church, I was able to not only see my condition, but to be freed from it. Today I realize that two things keep me strong and filled with genuine happiness and joy: one, the love and care from other Christians, and two, the precious blood of Jesus Christ. Not only was I cared for by the church, but I also realized that I have the blood of Christ to wash me from every stain and sin. After seeing the world for what it truly is and realizing that humanly I am weak, fallen, and incomplete, I realize where I belong. I belong in Christ...and He belongs in me. Beginning to Appreciate As a young person, I did not appreciate the many blessings I had in my life. Being young, immature, and undeveloped, I didn't even really know what a “blessing” was. However, as I grew older, and matured a bit in mind and heart, I began to realize and appreciate what I had. Since I was born, the writings of Watchman Nee and Witness Lee were available to me. My parents' bookshelves were filled with their books. Over the years, many of the other Christians I knew also encouraged me to read this and that book written by them. However, I did not appreciate them until I got older and began to read their books for myself. In considering their writings, I really can't separate what they wrote from how they lived. First of all these two brothers were one with each other in carrying out the Lord's commission to them - to teach the truth and build up the body of Christ. Second, the way they lived was full of lowliness, meekness, selflessness, great love for the Lord and a willingness to sacrifice to fulfill the Lord's heart's desire. Together with Paul they could say as in Galatians 2:20: “I am crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but it is Christ who lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live in faith ...” Through their ministry, my heart has been captivated by the Lord. I pray that the Lord would have the same mercy on me that I could lead such a life and live Christ as much as Watchman Nee and Witness Lee did. Laura Wall | Back to List |
|
|
Home
|
|
